


The Darkest Curse

by leightaylor



Series: The Gray Archives [1]
Category: Infernal Devices Series - Cassandra Clare, Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Adventure, Angst, Character Death, F/M, For Real This Is Really Sad, Heartbreak, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-23
Updated: 2015-12-23
Packaged: 2018-05-08 18:10:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5507750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leightaylor/pseuds/leightaylor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Theresa Gray-Herondale attends a party for her old friend Magnus, and ponders what her future as an immortal warlock will hold.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Darkest Curse

_New York, 1926_

 

Even after all this time, she didn’t know how she could still be awestruck by Magnus’s parties. She’d been to her fair share of formal events, both mundane and supernatural, but there was something special about those thrown by Magnus. They always had his charm, his liveliness. She stood on a balcony over the bank of a small lake, the party still raging in the mansion behind her. She looked up at the night sky but they were far too close to New York City for her to see any stars.  
But Theresa Gray-Herondale had eternity to watch the stars.  
She heard the glass door open and close behind her and turned to see her new companion.  
“You know,” Magnus said, waving his hand at his home, “there is a party going on in there.” Tessa peered at him through narrowed eyes. He wore a dark shirt and trousers made of a soft material Tessa was not familiar with. There were many silver jewels wrapped around his throat that gleamed in the moonlight.  
Tessa tilted her head. “It’s not like a woman of my age to be rowdy with a houseful of drunken twenty year olds.”  
Magnus chuckled. “No matter how long we are friends, I will never understand you.” He moved to sit on a dark velvet chair on the patio and patted the one next to it, indicating for Tessa to sit as well. She did so as Magnus crossed his legs and took a sip from the drink in his hand.  
“I didn’t know I was such an enigma” she joked. Magnus didn’t laugh. He just stared at her.  
“How old are your children, Tessa?”  
Tessa frowned. “Thirty-nine and forty.”  
Magnus nodded. “And Will? Where is he tonight?”  
“He’s at home in London. He’s sorry he couldn’t make it. It’s not every day your friend turns…?” She left the statement open, hoping to finally get a confirmation on how old Magnus truly was.  
Magnus just looked at her. “He’s at home because he’s too old to travel, especially overseas.”  
Tessa stiffened. “Well, yes,” she whispered. She’d known since she’d married Will that he would grow old, while she would not, and that one day he would no longer exist, and she would be alone.  
“I just don’t understand you.”  
“What is there to not understand?” Magnus was starting to upset her. Her life, while unconventional, was completely her choice. He had no right to speak to her condescendingly.  
“You do things that will set you up for heartbreak in the end.” He tapped his ring covered fingers against his glass of champagne. “You’re eternally young yet you’d rather stand outside, alone, than enjoy a party for one of your closest friends.”  
He was right. She knew he was right. But that didn’t make it hurt any less. Tessa grabbed the glass from Magnus’s hand and downed the entirety of its contents. She thrust the glass back at him, trying to keep her face clear of any signs of the bitter taste of the alcohol.  
Magnus looked shocked and as though he were trying not to laugh. “Why did you do that?”  
“I can live a little,” she choked out. “I’m fun.”  
Magnus shook his head. “Oh, Tessa.”  
They sat in silence for a few minutes, both gazing out at the dark blue water.  
“I think about it a lot,” Tessa finally said.  
“What?” Magnus asked.  
“The future. What I’ll do when Will dies, when my children…” she broke off and breathed deeply. “It’s inevitable, I know. I’ve known it for decades. Before I married Will, I’d spend days at a time thinking about how much it would hurt. The pain I’d endure for the rest of eternity. And when we had James, and then Lucie, those feelings were intensified. I don’t know how much I can bare.”  
Tessa paused to pick at the hem of her white dress. Magnus was waiting for her to continue. “I’ve thought about leaving when Will dies. Just taking my things and going. Seeing the world, meeting new people. But I can’t leave my children, or my grandchildren. I can’t just abandon them. And how long can I travel the world? I’m immortal. I could set foot on every inch of this planet. And then what?” She finished.  
It was a moment before Magnus spoke again. “Immortality is the darkest curse imaginable.”  
“How do you do it?”  
“Do what?” He raised a brow at her.  
“Live for as long as you have and still find enjoyment in life?”  
Magnus stretched and leaned back in his chair. “I don’t know. I just do.”  
Tessa rolled her eyes and laughed. “I thought you were supposed to be the wise one?”  
“That, I am,” Magnus said. “But I don’t know the answer everything.”  
Tessa tilted her head back and breathed in the crisp air. A new song began playing inside and she heard the cheers of the party goers as they recognized the tune. It was a catchy little thing that made her tap her shoe against the cement of the patio.  
“Dance with me,” Magnus said.  
Tessa gave him a look. “I’ll likely step on your toes. I have the gracefulness of a wild animal.”  
Magnus laughed. “What happened to the Tessa who could live a little?” He stood and held a hand out for her.  
Tessa sighed dramatically. “Well, I can’t say no to you on your birthday, now can I?” She grabbed his hand and let him lift her up. Soon she began swaying with him to the rhythm of the song.  
They danced and danced.  
“Don’t you have a party to get back to?” she asked.  
“What’s one birthday party out of thousands?” Magnus retorted.  
The song changed once again and Tessa nearly fell over as Magnus let go of her and started doing a very odd dance with his hands moving back and forth with his fingers spread completely out. She could feel the alcohol starting to take affect as she burst into a fit of giggles. “What are you doing?” she asked between laughs.  
“Exactly what it looks like - dancing!”  
Tessa began laughing louder. She attempted to mimic Magnus’s movements and failed miserably. Magnus laughed at her and when the song ended, they both collapsed onto the patio.  
Tessa brought her legs up under her dress and tried to catch her breath. She was sweating and her hair was sticking to her face.  
“Come with me,” Magnus whispered.  
Tessa looked over at him. “Where?”  
“Anywhere. Everywhere.” He said. His golden eyes looked straight at her. “You don’t have to be alone forever.”  
Tessa looked down at her wedding ring. “I-I don’t-”  
“Not right now, of course. It doesn’t have to be tonight or ten or a hundred years from now. But whenever you’re ready to leave, come with me.” She had never heard his voice so… sincere.  
“I don’t know, Magnus.”  
He shrugged and stood. “I think I’ve kept my guests waiting long enough. Are you coming in?” He tilted his head toward the glass door. Tessa could see inside, women in gold and silver and white dresses, not unlike her own. Men were spinning the women with one hand, holding glasses of champagne with the other. She knew there were others like her in there. Immortal. Aimless.  
She looked back at Magnus, still waiting for her answer. Tessa stood and smoothed out her dress.  
When Magnus smiled, she blurted out “I think I should call it a night. I’m heading home tomorrow and I need to sleep.” It was a lame excuse, she knew, and her heart felt as though someone squeezed it when she saw the disappointed expression on Magnus’s face.  
“Very well,” Magnus said, opening the glass door and waving her in front of him. It was instantly much louder than it had been outside and Tessa had to duck so that she was not hit by a woman being tossed by her dance partner. Tessa headed straight toward the staircase but before she could descend, Magnus caught her by the wrist and spun her to face him.  
“Give consideration to my offer,” he told her. Before she could respond, he had disappeared into the crowd.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a prologue to the rest of the series which is set between 1937 and 2007, and while it will line up with the canon events of 2007, what happens in between will be things not exactly stated in canon. So keep in mind that if Tessa goes through things that are unfamiliar to you, one this is fanfiction so that's what's supposed to happen, and two the end result will be the same as the books kept it.


End file.
